Disregard the previous whining and digressing [sigh of relief].  I am now at Avdi’s, killing it instead of time.  I’ll be here overnight.  My to-do list was so long, I haven’t had a moment edgewise to get angsty or bored.

I watered the downstairs seedlings, and did several loads of laundry (theirs and mine).  I gave Percy his salad, as promised!  I watered the whole garden.  I took photos, while beady-eyed rabbits watched.  I picked a new Shabbat bouquet.  I started the chicken (a Mediterranean theme with fresh herbs from the garden, marsala wine, tomatoes, balsamic, honey, onions, garlic, etc. etc….).  I harvested a pile of assorted radishes, and sliced them thin to go on fresh bread and butter.  I picked more garden greens for dinner.  I started the challah, and baked it.  I did routine chores around the house, getting it ready for Shabbat.

It’s always easy for me to keep busy here, while also enjoying the outdoors, which keeps me from being as annoying, let’s hope!

Meanwhile, Avdi and Jess worked in the office (with the usual colorful emoting), and Avdi unveiled his latest bread, a dark rye!  It was spectacular!  Fluffy and flavorful, especially with butter (and radishes!).

It’s still a little too early to plant the tomato, pepper, and basil seedlings, according to MO almanacs and fluctuating weather, which is a little annoying, but better to be patient and not kill them with over-enthusiasm.  I have plenty of other things here to keep me busy and out of trouble.

Avdi concocted this very nice drink featuring fancy mezcal, Suze French liqueur, sparkling water, and a lime.

I had a dream that my mother, after this latest hospitalization and “rehab”, suddenly made this amazing recovery back to being a sentient being, dressed and in her right mind.  It was such a shock and relief to see her that way.  (In reality, she’s a demented zombie who can only howl like an alley cat, can’t attend to her own basic hygiene, and qualifies for hospice.)  Just thought I’d throw that in there.  If only “modern” science could do that.

While I’m digressing, I find it so absurd and ironic that all the books that were required reading in high school back in the last century(!) are now on the banned list.  How is it our country can regress to such a terrifying degree?  We were encouraged to read whatever was available in those conservative days on racism, women’s rights and sexuality, homophobia, native genocide, environmental issues, evolution and science, and all the “controversial” anti-establishment books.  (OK, maybe not “Lolita”, but it wasn’t that hard to come by!)  How have we even progressed at all?

My trans ex in Ohio grew up with extreme transphobia and ignorance, and her grandchildren whom she loves are being brainwashed by Trump-supporting families to hate and shun her and all trans people.  She worked in the schools until the transphobic church-goers among them ganged up and forced her out.  I’d like to think that there have to be some reasonable, educated parents, teachers, and trans/non-binary students there who could somehow influence those grandkids and others like them to open their minds, but I’m not optimistic.  It’s a vicious generational noose.

And that’s just bland Ohio; I’ve lived in Tennessee, and now Missouri, and have seen how pervasive and insidious this “virus” can be in the highest levels of government, where you’d think people would have to be more educated just to qualify for those positions, but apparently not.  This is how fascism gets started; it’s eerily familiar.  I fear the only hope is for all the irrational old haters to die off, and allow all the Black, gender-queer, informed kids to take over.

Well.  This is what happens when I’m left alone in my apartment for too long…I get to thinking, not a good sign!  Soon I’ll be over Avdi’s watering, cooking, baking, and puttering, a more productive use of what brain I have left.  To be continued…

It’s getting desperate!  Absolutely nothing to write about!  I’m reduced to a photo of the salad I ate.

And waiting for rain.  I even did some apt. laps, I was that desperate!

It’s fine, tomorrow I’ll go to Avdi’s and do the garden and Shabbat things.  When the Gkids descend, I’ll look back in disbelief at all the time-killing I could do.

Killing time is the enemy, when there’s so little of it left to kill.  It saps your soul and leaves you feeling empty and purposeless.  At least doing busywork for others makes you imagine you’re useful to someone, or forget you’re a thing of their past.

Too much?  I rest my case!

I spent the night and day at my apartment, which is like my office, where I take care of business but mostly just try to think of useful things to do.  I’m not sure I succeeded, but I kept myself occupied.  I filled out some medical forms, and did other busywork.

The photos are a dead giveaway.  My new “salad bar” is more productive than I am.  I did make a stir-fry of my cut of yesterday’s garden greens.  I hung up my pride flag.

I haven’t even been outside all day–nowhere to go and no money to spend.  Not complaining, just a fact.  If it rains tomorrow as predicted, I won’t have an excuse to go water Avdi’s garden.  “I know, wretched, isn’t it?”  (Marvin)

As foretold, I got back to work this morning, watering, resowing some seeds, cleaning up the piles of tree limbs I cut yesterday, and harvesting greens and the first radishes, which I divided between Avdi and myself.  Percy got his salad, as usual (minus the radishes).

Then I walked back to my apartment.  (I was going to say home, but I live in two places right now.)  I had the freshest (and free-est) salad you can get for lunch.

I walked to Avdi’s this morning, and headed you know where.  First up was watering the garden, which took a while.

Then I set up a large planter with okra seeds, which solves the problem of where to put okra.  I added some butternut squash seeds to their row.  Then I started pruning and lopping dead branches, of which there were many.

I feel much healthier and saner after getting back to my “mission”.  I’ll spend the night here, and then start back up in the garden in the morning.

I know “sanguinity” is not a word, but it should be, combining optimism and sanity to describe my garden therapy.  Not just a hobby.  Plus it’s free and it pays.

Sorry about that yesterday.  Too much time to think.  Once I get back into the garden, things get a little more upbeat and positive.

In the meantime, I eke out some growing things wherever I can.  Just a couple of days ago I started these lettuces and greens for a mini-salad bar, and look at them already!  I won’t even have to fend off rabid rabbits.

Same with this little Thai basil I started hydroponically–it didn’t waste any time.

My orchid is still happily showing off its colors.  Orchids are in it for the long term.

And even though I didn’t grow this butternut squash (which I yummily roasted), of course I saved the seeds to add to the row in Avdi’s garden.  (Also, baking it helped warm up my chilly apartment.  I had turned the heat off, but it really chilled down outside, into the 30s at night.  I’m glad I held off moving the tomato and pepper plants outside.)

It’s pretty obvious where I’d rather be right now, is it not?

Technically I don’t have to write today, since I posted multiple times on other days, but you know me, I must bore you daily with inane blahging.

Only, there’s literally nothing to write about, sitting in my apartment.  I don’t have my own garden, or the means to get most places.  Now that I have the time, I can’t join groups protesting or alleviating social injustice issues, without funds or mobility.  My grocery money went to dental expenses this month, so even shopping is out.

But hey, who’s kvetching?  I’m still alive, some of my teeth are still in my mouth for now, my son and family are nearby and accessible, I live in a fascist state (oh wait, how did that get in there?), I live in a pretty progressive town if you ignore the surrounding state, (which is hard to do right about now, but I’m trying), and if I run out of food I can always walk to Avdi’s garden and compete with mobs of sinister rabbits for salad (or kill the wabbit, if I get desperate; I hear it tastes like chicken.)

Seriously, it’s like a fascist state here.  How do humans get so phobic and hateful and repulsive?  How can we progress when we’re always outvoted and overpowered by racist, transphobic nazis?  Not feeling the optimism right now.  Don’t know what to do about it.  All I know to do is be a supportive ally to those who may make a difference in a future world that I won’t live to see.  And grow them some veggies.

Like I said, not much to say…

There should be a Hitchcock horror movie, The Rabbits.  Everywhere you walk in Avdi’s yard, there they are, lurking, stalking, multiplying, and staring at you with their big beady empty eyes.  They stand up on their hind legs and watch you.  They even come toward you instead of away from you.  There is something very disturbing about rabbits.

Anyway, Shabbat Shalom!

Also, beer.  A wonderful Tröegs Nugget Nectar from PA.  To help me forget about the scawy scwewy wabbits.

I got off to an early start this morning, watering the parched garden, planting more herb seedlings, weeding around the newly germinated veggies, and cultivating between the garden rows.  Almost all veggies are now coming up and thriving, and even ready to harvest.

While out there, I took more plant photos, watched by two large rabbits who barely moved out of the way, they’re getting so used to me.

Then I prepared Hawaiian-style chicken for the slow cooker, and started the Challah.  Avdi and Jess worked (with lots of colorful language!) in the office and on the patio.  I’m also making roasted sweet potatoes with my own Hawaiian-style spice mix, and, wait for it, the very first salad of the year from Avdi’s garden!

I may post some Shabbat pics later.