This is turning into a doggy-interest feature, but I assure you it’s temporary.  I’m just waiting for the official green flag to start the garden season for real.

It seems there is a cat-and-dog standoff at Jess’s.  Pixie is making sure Loucious knows she’s the alpha-cat, be afraid!  (All she has to do is stare at him.)

Over at Avdi’s, Billie is an adorable little fur ball with legs who is only happy when all the big dogs (us) are home.  The rest of the time she lies on her bed looking worried.

Allie presented me with this restaurant-quality lunch when I got there yesterday.  She even recites the ingredients like a professional chef, having had some previous culinary experience.  I won’t pretend to remember them, but it was good.

I did the usual erev preps, not as professionally, but “creatively”.  The kids demand certain foods, then reliably forget about them until they need to be used up, then accuse each other of eating “their” special requests.  So I use that to my advantage!

We had a full, lively table for Shabbat.  The only thing missing was Loucious approving of the challah.  It’s always with the sit-down comedy routines!  Lots of colorful language and references.  My parents would die all over again if they were here.  But to me it means the kids feel secure and trusting enough to be themselves, and so do their friends.  In the terrifying world they find themselves, a safe space is essential.

Presto Chango, Loucious has shapeshifted into a micro mini-sheep!  Is there nothing this dog can’t do?

Sike.  In actual fact, we had to play musical dogs and take L to Jess’s temporarily, so the visiting Billie (yes, that tiny, cowering creature) didn’t freak Loucious out!  It was a complicated day!

L was like, what am I doing here?! but soon adjusted well with all the familiar pack members.  (The cats were banished to upstairs for the time being.)  Meanwhile, Billie, with her resting terror face, took over Avdi’s and all the people!  L would be so jealous!!  I got to catch up with Allie later, after getting L situated.

Earlier, I removed all the old lumber serving as a path from the veg garden.

Today we hope to do a controlled dog meetup, to see how L will do with B.  We hope he’ll think she’s a tiny sheep and herd her around!

First, a side note.  Underneath the surface of all my cheesey, heartwarming dog-and-garden-show posts, life in and around my family is very complicated and stressful right now, especially for the breadwinner.  My small part is just a drop in the bucket of unending responsibilities and worries that all need addressing.

This is a particularly uneasy, difficult time in history for anyone to survive and function as it is, especially if you are supporting a whole houseful of kids with special needs and barely keeping up with work.  We live in a country controlled and endorsed by vile white racists dead set against people just living and breathing.  Nothing new, but we seem to be reaching a deadly climax.  As I often say, nature itself will wreak havoc and justice upon us if we continue like this.

This is the backdrop against which I post my prosaic snapshots of everyday life.  I feel like we don’t need one more hysterical person having a meltdown over dirty old white men doing what they’ve always done only more so, when plenty of capable, intelligent people are bearing witness to it.  Thus, I just report on my small corner of the world, and try to find ways to make things more livable while I can.  If it cheers you up, all the better!

Having said all that, look at that comical doggy face.  He’s about to have a new adventure at Jess’s with cats, while another doggy friend, Billie, visits us.  (Loucious doesn’t like dogs.  But we’re going to work on that later.)

Garden notes: I took a mattock to the compost mountain and stabbed it a lot, until it started to surrender.  Then I loaded up the cart twice and applied the compost to the new raised bed.  While there, I noticed all these bulb flower shoots coming up through the layers.  Of course I was multitasking with frisbee-dog the whole time.  Progress has been made.

I think the next big project is to cultivate the veg garden by hand, so as to avoid disrupting the soil structure as much as possible.  Same for the existing raised beds, where I think I will plant the lettuces, greens, spinach, and peas, etc., by the middle of March.  This is really happening!

Meanwhile, having been recruited onto the kid-shuttle schedule, I picked up K and E from the high school yesterday.  All went smoothly.  I could see hibernation in my rearview mirror.  Today I think I’ll get to the carwash, and wash away any further dormancy dreams.  Which is fine, because it’s supposed to be 70° out today.  In mid-February.

Later I go to the cancer doctor, to be reminded that I have untreatable cancer, wheeeee!!  So inconvenient.

Garden notes: as suspected, the big open pile of dirt is fully rooted in again, almost impenetrable.  I wish I had a front-end loader!  I want to use the soil on the new raised bed as a top layer, and then move the rest to the woodsy area, after I clean it up.  Anyway, that’s the current plan.  These false spring warm days are making me crazy, waiting.

Y’s little downstairs flower (and cactus!) garden is taking over and about to bloom!

Yesterday was back to the usual, at least for me.  The kids were still off (long weekend), K had the MTG gang over, and we had our rescheduled charcuterie meeting.  Loucious had his pack!  Avdi had his usual stressors.

Yes, this is one of those humdrum posts, so bear with me as I reluctantly remain conscious in winter.

A belated Happy Birthday to Me!  I was busy being partied over at the Avdi’s.  It was my best birthday yet.  To review:

It rained all Saturday and overnight, but it wasn’t cold, more like early spring.  Jess gave me a bottle of decent bourbon.  I spent the night as usual, and later Avdi took me out to Olympia Greek Taverna for lunch.  It was new to us, and we both loved it.  The food and relaxed atmosphere were excellent.

Back at the house, E with help from friend S, was baking me a cake from scratch.  It took him a while to get it right, but it was totally worth waiting for.  K had her MTG friends over, and Y had his friend A over, so it became an impromptu party.  Loucious was in his element.  Jess ordered a huge stack of pizzas for everyone, including one with anchovies!

Check out the gorgeous custom cake and friends.  I can’t think of a better way to spend my birthday.  I know Avdi was less than enthused, because some kid drama went down earlier which left him frustrated and tired.  Then Jess surprised me by handing me the Fit keys, so back in the saddle again for now!

Off the subject, but never far, I should mention I’m considering the no-till (layered “lasagna”) method of gardening!  I’ve read up on it, and the science makes sense.  I know, I was going to “rototill the fxxk” out of the veg garden, but it turns out I’ve only been making life harder for the soil constituents and therefore for myself.  I’m a little behind the program, but I’ve already started it in other beds, and I think I’ll have more longterm success.  Stay tuned for my next revised plan in five minutes.

First, a disclaimer: I was not duped by the uncannily warm weather into disrupting dormant wildlife by raking leaves!  Those leaves are from the patio only, so few to no critters were harmed in the making of this post!  Also, the leaves were merely transferred to better locations.  Do not take this as a prompt to begin spring clearance i.e. mass murder too early!

Having said that, Loucious really enjoyed yesterday’s project of applying leaves to various garden beds.  You can see how helpful he was.  He learned a new trick, a leaf-ride!  Our friend J showed up and stole Loucious’s heart by playing frisbee with him for an hour or so.

The challot came out particularly well, as Loucious can attest to, and everyone enjoyed dinner together.  Oh yeah, by the way, it has been unofficially official for a while now that L is part of our family.  I’m sure you figured that out before me.

Today it’s raining, for a change of pace, which is a good thing for the garden.  Also an auspicious sign for erev my birthday, which I’ll spend overnight and tomorrow with the family as usual, so Avdi can get out.  Do not ask my age, it’s top secret, i.e. I forget.

Today in the Garden: I was able to extract finished compost from the bin and apply it to the future strawberry patch.  I also removed all the wire border edging along the front of the “edge of woods” area, to be used later.  Some frisbee happened as well.

I have a pretty good plan in mind for all the beds this year; I just have to save the more intrusive tasks until more critters have emerged.  That will ensure that more beneficial interaction and pollination take place, and veggies and flowers do well.

The plant pictured is native columbine coming back.  There are also lots of spring flower bulbs sprouting.  Also witch hazel blooming.  I have a good feeling about this spring.

Yesterday was so warm, Loucious and I spent the whole afternoon outside with the frisbee.  I found something I could do without disrupting dormant pollinators and critters: I took down all the fairy lights around the big shade native area and then the whole framework of poles and lumber.  Later on I’ll clean up the area and rewire the lights more aesthetically.  Loucious amused himself between throws by plowing the leaves with the frisbee.

This morning I met Jess at the Annex (coffee shop) to relinquish the car and get a ride to Avdi’s.  Guess what that means?  I walked home this evening and am carless until next week!  It feels weird to be on foot again, but I really need the exercise.  I did try to make myself useful giving rides while I could.

Y has been doing a good job growing his own flowers downstairs under lights, since I decided not to germinate veggies indoors this season.  It’s nice to see him taking on the role.  I did go ahead and order all the seeds for the growing season, customized to the Avdi’s, to direct-sow later.  I have my whole new gardening plan pretty much laid out in my head.  It’s just a matter of time now; trying to be patient!  The longer I hold off, the more beneficial pollinators and critters will make it alive to do their essential stuff.

I did come up with a system for inventorying all categories of food and nonfood staples at the Avdi’s, then checking off what we need and adding those items to Avdi’s list.  It isn’t perfected to his requirements yet, but getting there.  Converting analog thinking to digital everything is still a challenge sometimes.  Plus his household requires a vast quantity of items!

In fact, lately I know I’ve been inadequate or failing to perform at the level or role that he needs me to, or take on all the tasks he requires of me for the household to function.  I want to do my part, but my anxieties and deficiencies get in the way.  To others, it must look like I’m just shirking routine (to them) responsibilities, with all the needs there are.

I guess I should be honored that at almost age 74, half blind, {with cancer!}, they still have the confidence to rely on me to this extent.  I just don’t feel qualified or adequate sometimes.  But in the end, the urgency will compel me to push myself past the anxiety and get the job done.  Which is progress.

Sometimes, though, it’s hard to work past the feeling that no matter how much I do to help out, I’m just an annoyance or invisible.  I get it; everyone’s busy being overwhelmed by life, the universe, and everything.  There are demons to do battle with!   I’ve had my share; I empathize.  It’s hard to survive, let alone live.  So I try to stay out from underfoot, or keep my foot out of my mouth.  I’m still working on my people skills, after all this time.  Maybe I’ll get it right one of these days.

Anyway, enough whining.  Have some doggy!  Notice how inconspicuous he looks on that bed, like a doggy throw pillow.