First, a proud mother shoutout to my son Avdi, who is the best person who ever happened to me. He’s a hard act to follow! I look up to him very much, and hope he gets a break one of these days. Cheers! I miss him every day. I hope to remedy that as soon as possible.
Next, I couldn’t be luckier to have my daughter-in-law Stacey, who is more like a friend and daughter I never had. Also an excellent Mother. She works way too hard, and never gets a day off. Slainte!
I called my own mother this morning. That’s always been a difficult relationship for me, even more so since she’s had Alzheimer’s and leukemia, and barely remembers anything. The role reversal thing while caregiving was a bitch. She still knows who I am, unlike my father before he died, so that’s something. But it’s like talking to a ghost.
It’s a sad day for E, who can never be a mother, but feels the losses like one. Her own mother hatefully rejected her, and lives in some confused selfish delusion. Her living children likewise. Her grandchildren have been cruelly withheld from her. So M-day for E is more like M for memorial.
I guess every family has its dysfunctions and challenges. I feel pretty fortunate to be part of a surviving family that is uniquely nonconventional, tolerant, and inclusive. They are those things toward us, which says a lot for them. I know I’ve been challenging at times! Where would I be without them? And for E, they’re like a foster family that she never had.
Ok, enough rambling. I’ll just say to all the mothers out there who are exhausted, under-appreciated, or grieving the loss of their own mothers, whether dead or to all intents and purposes gone, stay strong and keep on doing what you do, with the family you do have, blood or otherwise.
Here’s a pretty columbine.