Here are some highlights of the erev meal: steamed rutabagas, carrots and peas with maple, fresh-herbed Mexican-spiced roast chicken, an Indian-style chickpea rice vegetable casserole (not shown), and for later, a homemade strawberry cheesecake.

Life must go on, even in a crazy-ass insane country.  That self-destruct sure is taking time, but I have to hold onto some faith in our constitutional law working as it was meant to.  Otherwise, our democracy as we know it is over.

I neglected to mention E’s nice new batch of challah yesterday, so here is some.  The Skullies are making a brave attempt at cheeriness amid the boxes.

Here are some cilantro seedlings coming up, and my ginger shooting up.  Life goes on.

The tension of being boxed in, waiting and hoping the next step in the process will proceed without a hitch, has been admittedly stressful.  Next week we’ll know if all the hard work of rebuilding credit has paid off, and we can be approved.  We never take anything for granted, after all the damage done by malicious people.

Well, erev must go on, so off to the kitchen with me.  Have a good one.

The documentary “Happy” examines people in all walks of life all over the world to figure out what makes people genuinely happy.  Studies show that once you get beyond basic food, shelter, and a certain level of income, an increase in the latter doesn’t equate to more happiness; in fact the opposite can be true.  The resulting pressure and anxiety can actually detract from your health and wellbeing, and even kill you.

What happy people seem to share in common are four simple ingredients:

1. Physical activity, in whatever form is meaningful to you, raises dopamine in the brain, which makes you feel better.
2. Appreciation of what you do have, however humble or challenging, versus wishing for things you’ll never achieve, is a key factor in contentment.
3. Connection to a healthy support network of friends, family, and community is essential for completeness and security.  (The “village” model vs. the self-sufficient loner.)
4. Compassion and service to others, however small or limited, takes you out of yourself and brings a sense of purpose and fulfillment, the bigger picture.

The concept of “happy” has never meant much to me.  It seems like an elusive obsession that by definition can never be achieved, except perhaps as an incidental byproduct of living a meaningful, intentional life (whatever that is to you).  Having no regrets comes into it somewhere.  I am NOT the leading world expert on the subject! 😉

I do agree that humans need a certain basic minimal level of food, clothing, shelter, healthcare, security, and a safety net, just for starters, and to deny any of those basic needs and rights is indefensible and inhumane.  Our so-called president is ensuring that even his supporters will be some very unhappy, discontented humans.  This state can not be sustained indefinitely; something has to give.

I do know from personal experience that when I’m not engaged in some meaningful outdoor connection to nature, I’m like a neurotic caged animal, not amused.

I have learned from this Ohio experience that it’s amazing how okay you can be with less, and not just resigned to it.

I do sometimes feel the lack of connection to a strong, healthy human network.  Even an introvert needs a certain minimum support system.  I’m thankful for the family and friends I do have, however remote.  I’ve witnessed what the loss of all healthy connections can do to someone.

There’s a part of me (Aquarian, after all) that always feels a need to reach out and be some small part of serving greater humanity outside of my own small, self-centered needs, and incomplete when I have few such outlets.  It’s a poor, narrow life that only looks out for itself.  Extending ourselves is what separates us from being brutes.

I’m very aware of how fortunate I am, having been born after the Depression, WW2, Holocaust, Cold War, and other horrors.  At the same time, my parents’ generation raised us on the premise of “never again”, i.e. sheltered, spoiled, materialistic, and entitled.  There is something to be said for growing up appreciative and resourceful with what little you have to work with.  I’ve had to learn the “hard” way.

The hippie back-to-the-land movement came about through disillusionment with all the artificial materialism and greed, but most of us could afford to opt out of the system, being privileged to begin with.  Many people did not have those options.  Here I am, full-circle, among mainstream working class people who have had to struggle and slave just to make it, never mind find contentment.

By comparison, I feel fortunate.  I have basic necessities, a small network of family and friends,  some hope of a future near them in a place of our own with access to the natural world, and maybe even opportunities to be of service.  “Happy” may or may not apply, but I can’t complain.  As my son would say, I’m still here.  There’s something to be said for not being dead yet!

Many flowers were blooming after all the rain at John Bryan.  Among them were waterleaf, phlox, dame’s rocket, geranium, ginger, columbine, violets, trillium, jack-in-the-pulpit, mayapple, false solomon’s seal, sedum, ragwort, tuliptree, wild viburnum(?), and a huge thing that I believe was angelica, by the river.

Here’s a mourning dove on the wires over the garden, and a still life of coffee and flowers.  That pretty much sums up my life right now, waiting…

I have a feeling we’ll be hiking soon, so you can assume there will be photos eventually.

I hate killing time, but I know pretty soon that will change to crazy moving mode, and then setting up shop mode, and then doing what we do best mode.  This is just the calm before the whirlwind, and in retrospect it will make sense.

It was raining, and we went shopping clothing sales for E.  This is a big deal for her, buying actual  clothes, after a lifetime of having very little for herself.  I myself have given away bazillions more clothes than she’s ever owned.  Yet she feels spoiled and guilty “indulging” herself by buying a few necessities.  I have to keep reassuring her that it’s all right.

These ducks (mallards I think) were out in the mall parking lot, along with many geese and even a gosling or two, enjoying the puddles.  That was my nature fix for the day.

I read this very helpful article that I recommend:  https://medium.com/@robin.chancer/how-to-stay-sane-if-trump-is-driving-you-insane-advice-from-a-therapist-42e982195e22 .  It gives a different psychological perspective on dealing with the political insanity around us right now.

That’s all I have for now.

Mowing the lawn.  It sounds tedious and mundane.  But for me, limited in my outdoor outlets, mowing day is my favorite.  Pathetic, I know.  But it gives me an excuse to be outside, checking on my plants’ progress and what few animals can be observed, and it clears my head.  I figured out that when I’m mowing, my mind goes almost blank, devoid of all the issues and worries, just focused on the job, the before and after effect.  That’s why it’s therapeutic for me.  Once we move to our “secret garden” and eliminate the environmentally useless lawn feature, I’ll really be in my element.

We have: violas, columbine, ferns, hosta, sage, dames rocket, chives, iris, and bleeding heart.

I know this has to be the most boring blahg in the history of blogs, but hey, life must go on, and it’s not all profound.  Much of it is just getting through a day without blowing it too badly or resigning yourself to mediocrity.  I know I’ll never be a genius, but honestly, I learn something new or different each day, which is more than I can say for many folks down at this level.

I have a lot of thoughts swirling through my head, but I’m not even going to attempt to articulate them.  So if instead I post pictures of, say, this really delicious savory pie E bakes now and then, 

or this pretty tuberous begonia I got today,

it doesn’t mean I’m a vegetable-brain, it just signifies my attempt to find innocuous normalcy and beauty in the midst of an insane, undependable world with an unsure future.  What else is there, sometimes?  “When the world is running down, you make the best of what’s still around.”  (The Police.)

The good news is, we’re one day closer to finding a home.  I’m resolving here and now to be content with and thankful for wherever we end up, which will still be far better than much of the world has it.  Next I resolve to try to turn my little corner of the world into a safe haven, and leave it better than I found it.  Finally, I’m going to try to leave whining and discontent behind as we shut the door on this hapless chapter, and start a new life with a clean slate.  That’s my aim, anyway.

This is my life right now: packing boxes, and gazing outside at the weather, imagining all my flowers coming up without me.  Hmm, sounds a lot like my last days in the Vortex.  Only this time around, it’s only a matter of time before we reach our final destination, the Secret Garden.  The best kept secret in TN, for the time being, but soon to be revealed to us in all its gardeny-ness.

Meanwhile, here’s some sky, in between rain events.

It’s hard to find a shot without boxes and packing material in it!  Also challenging to scrounge up the requisite Shabbat décor that isn’t packed, but I thrive on being resourceful.  The Skullies are still here, so all is well.

It’s been pouring for days, which suits me just fine.  Out there somewhere the garden is happy, and we’re preoccupied inside.  Here’s a shot of yesterday’s early morning sky, which I never got around to posting.  And here is early morning lettuce on the windowsill.

The good news is, we’ve officially initiated our realtor’s search, and she sent the first of hopefully many potential properties.  It will be challenging to keep our sights down to realistic options within our very limited price range, but all we need is a tiny house in the county, with functional plumbing, electric, sewer, roof, structurally intact, etc.), and an acre or two to play around in, with no pesky neighbors too nearby.  Not much to ask, right?  We’ve actually lowered our expectations to whatever works to get us out of here ASAP.  We’re almost all packed up, that’s how serious we are.

Well, back to the kitchen, where I’m making navy bean soup with veggies and herbs, roasted spicy chicken, basmati rice, stir-fry style greens, and a spiked minty fruit salad.  Life must go on amid chaos.  Cheers!