I’m glad I took Jess up on the invitation to their family christmas day dinner and hangout.  Their kids were home.  We combined it with the first Chanukah light in the evening, lit by Avdi.  Eric actually made superb thick steaks for everyone!  The decadence!  The drinks were amazing, too, maybe too much so!

And, I got to peruse the Attic of the Mysteries and came out with lots of little treasures for the (G)kids.  I got my kitty fix–Odin was happily lazing in comfort, and Pixie even condescended to approach (with snack bribes).

We all sat around the table having an intelligent conversation about political fears.  Then Jess and Avdi even sucked me into a game of Scrabble, which I lost big time, with such formidable opponents.

The best aspect of the evening was just being with extended family in a warm, casual atmosphere, no pressure or expectations.  It was good to see Avdi again, in his element, with no kid-stress for the time being.

Just chillin’ at my apt, playing tunes.  It’s a cool rainy day.  Out back, I caught these shots of early winter colors in the rain.  There’s always beauty to be found in drab surroundings, and my inner sanctum is tricked out just the way I like it, reflecting my self.

Later I’m invited to J’s for dinner.  I get to see my son again!  There may be an expedition to the Attic of the Mysteries.  Maybe I’ll find an ancient ritual toilet seat headdress.  Every day’s an adventure when you’re making the most of the time left.

And alas, they only had enough tchotchkes for one day, or perhaps three.  But Lo, the tchotchkes miraculously multiplied to last for eight days (or however many days were left)!  (How do they do that??)  And that’s before I explore The Attic of the Mysteries.  It is an ancient Chanukah Miracle.  And the children rejoiced.  They’d better, because the money gods are broke.  Oy.

Another day of luxuriating and getting things done.  It took me half the day to wrap all the tchotchkes and make the obligatory bookmarks.  I almost forgot to eat.  It’s a good thing I only have a half dozen or so people to gift, who all know I’m poor!  I feel fortunate I can do this much.

Another baby elephant ear has joined the herd.  They’re so cute when they’re young.

This is a plug for a great local small business: https://www.getyourpickson66.com.  Having some time off, I was able to browse the many booths of vintage antiques and find almost all the wishlist gifts I was looking for, with pleasant help from the employees and Putter the Dog.  There were quite a few customers doing same, in a much more relaxed atmosphere than a frenzied big box store, and for much less cost.  I recommend it for therapy and sanity.

I’m doing staycationy things: sleeping and dreaming a ton, cooking my own food, spending money I don’t technically have on gifts but enjoying it, reading, watching new series and movies, doing propagatrix things, making granola, drinking, oh the decadence.  I’m soaking it up while I can, because the next four years will be no picnic for anyone.

We had another full and boisterous house for Shabbat, with Stacey arriving to stay over and take the kids to Florida for the holidays.  Avdi made a delicious Indian palak paneer with rice, and a banana coconut bread.  We all hung out around the table talking until the candles burned down.

Now I get another staycation, while Avdi gets to unwind and rest and work uninterrupted.  It’s the winter solstice, so the days will start getting longer (by one second, but we’ll take it).  All I have to do is sit out the xmas feeding frenzy until it’s over (yay), and scrounge up a few more Chanukah tchotchkes for when the kids get back.  It’s hard when you’re broke, but we have ways.

I lied–the kids aren’t officially on full vacation; there were finals, studying, extracurricular activities, clubs, etc. to go back and forth to, while S is still on a full day.  It gets confusing, with all the comings and goings.  At one point, I wasn’t sure if I was home alone or not!  Jess and now Joyce have been nice enough to pitch in with rides when able.  It’s literally a community effort.

Meanwhile, A was in and out with yet more shopping errands and kid shuttling.  He made another delicious Italian meal in the slow cooker.  Somewhere in there he worked.  I got the job of sorting and filling the kids’ feed bags for the trip with their Mom to Florida to visit the other grandparents for the holidays.  She’ll be here overnight.

Y and a friend made this German cheesecake.  The other photos are my tropicals, etc. at home, and the neighbors’ color-changing “tree” again.  Not a lot happening outside.

Today I was able to walk to A’s and garden much of the day, it being in the high 40s.  Besides, the kids began their vacation this afternoon, so naturally E took over the kitchen and I was “banned”!  It was worth it, though, because they/he made a fabulous tiramisu from scratch, including the lady fingers.  Avdi made a wonderful Tuscan bean soup.

In the garden I continued to remove the old cardboard and cultivate the rest of the empty spaces.  Pretty soon it will start to look like an actual winter veg garden.  Then I trimmed and cleaned up the herb bed and labeled it, so it looks like an herb garden again and not a jungle.

In the house, I always manage to find jobs to do, but I’m running low on ideas!  Then I just hang out with S, while everyone else is coming and going, and serve dinner.  Joyce came by tonight with an Italian bread to go with the soup, so we had a chance to catch up a little.  Then Jess, Avdi, and Y showed up, and S got all excited and hyper with all the people to rope in and show off to.  It would have been party-like, if everyone wasn’t so worn out.  I admitted to Jess on the drive home how I sometimes look forward to my quiet apartment.

Yesterday was different, in that I got to go see S sing in his school holiday show.  I felt like I was playing hooky from work to go to school!  I did nothing in the garden, but it was too wet anyway.

When S feels secure, he’s quite the performer.  Seeing him in context with his fellow special needs classmates, some of whom are extremely disabled, gave me some perspective.  Even though in some ways he’s much more functional and cognizant than most, he seems to feel comfortable and empathetic with the situation, rather than misplaced.  The classes are very small and appropriate to the level of function, and he seems to get the supervision and attention he needs.

After his part in the show, he was allowed to sit with us and watch the rest, pointing out his friends, and how he had helped in production.  We were duly proud.

Later on at home, he was showing off his dance moves to my music.  Another example of his unselfconscious performance when he feels secure.  It seems to run in A’s family.  Since I’ve been here, I’ve witnessed all the kids overcoming their anxieties and insecurities in crowds to become more outgoing and less self-conscious in front of people.  It’s an impressive transformation.

It was so nice out yesterday, I walked the long way, then continued work on the garden, pulling dead plants, removing old cardboard, cultivating more spaces, and cutting back greens.  I know it looks like a crazy patchwork right now, but it’s actually a functioning garden in December!  Once it finally gives up the ghost for good, I’ll cultivate the whole thing and add organic material.  My ulterior motive is to persist with garden therapy as long as I can.  Just like this stubborn orange calendula.  It really does boost my mental state.

Speaking of mental, just a note to self for the record.  I had unblocked Ohio E for a time, just to give us a chance to try again to communicate in a reasonable, civil manner between friends, what she claimed she wanted, but predictably, it deteriorated back into passive-aggressive, blamey judgey self-defense, paranoia, and negativity.  Long repetitious lectures about what’s wrong with everyone and the world.  She’s a “good, nice person” but I’m selfish and my family is evil or something.  And she wonders why she can’t make and keep decent friends.  So blocked again it is.  I don’t feel as bad this time, because I gave her multiple chances, and she brings it on herself.  (She’s off social media, so it’s safe to speak plainly.)

I threw some photos of night lights in just for variety.  The “tree” is the neighbors’.