my first granddaughter is officially entering the grownup ranks. not to say she hasn’t been unofficially initiated already. in many respects she’s already there, except for the legal majority part. but it’s a milestone all the same.
this isn’t a post about how it makes me feel to be that old! it’s about her, and my proud and heartfelt hopes for her finding a new beginning out there in the wide, wacky world of adulthood.
it’s not all good out there, but she already knows that quite well. you burst out upon adulthood with passion and anticipation, believing there’s a mysterious adventure around every corner, like the kid you still are, only to get more reality and confusion smacked in your face, multiple times, as many times as it takes to revise your hopes and expectations and adapt to cold, hard facts. but still you want to believe, and take on the world, and experiment with all the possibilities. even the dangerous ones. even when it hurts.
this also isn’t a post about what i think my granddaughter should look out for or avoid. this is her brand-new life, and she deserves to discover it for herself, just as we did. some of us didn’t really get a clue what we were supposed to be doing here for, well, quite a while into our adult years. some of us may still not get it! following our example is not necessarily what i would recommend to her!
this is about her, and the release and self-realization and validation i wish for her. it’s the threshold between being subject to adult supervision and constraint, and having the liberty to make her own decisions and mistakes.
and there will be mistakes, it’s human nature. may she wisely learn from them and not repeat them too many times! also there will be pain and disappointment. may she have the courage and strength to get back up and revise the plan and adapt. the key is in the learning process and the resilience to keep moving forward.
in short, i have a lot of faith in my granddaughter, and believe in her ability and intelligence to figure it all out on her own. i may be a bad influence, or at least not much of an influence at all, which could be a good thing! but if i can ever be of any assistance or support, i hope she knows i am here. fwiw.
i won’t bore her to death any more, if she’s indulgent enough to read this humble speech. i’ll just mention this little anecdote i read in a scifi story: ‘a yard is hard, but an inch is a cinch!’ in other words, when you’re trying to survive a life-and-death situation, or any emotional crisis, the way to get through it is to assess your basic needs, and take a tiny step toward the first priority only. and then another. do not look at the enormity of the entire obstacle and try to solve it all at once. you could die just lying there feeling overwhelmed. but you can never go wrong just taking on that first inch toward a solution.
and don’t be ashamed or afraid to call for help.
now girl, you take on this crazy world, and astonish it with your beautiful psychedelic self!