the wild urge to hibernate

over two months into my newly re-established habit of getting outdoors in some form daily, and i’m running into a debate with my strong hibernation instinct. it’s WINTER, for crying out loud!! no respectable, sensible hibernating subspecies goes out for a walk in this! (‘this’ being a cold, windy, sunny day; if it were snowing, i’d be so out there. that’s different.) so, do i partially suspend the habit rules for hibernation months, and resume full operations at a more logical time, making exceptions for snow days? this is a rhetorical question. we will continue to debate it, while sitting at our warm computer. (‘we’ being the hibernator vs. the procrastinator, so not much contention there.)

now that i think about it, there is this one advantage to being an unemployed caregiver in the VOE: hibernation without the guilt. any self-respecting hibernator would do the same, with no qualms. when i recall those endless decades freezing my ass off at work, wondering how sane people could live like that, it appears that i have gotten my wish. not exactly the way i would have fulfilled it, but it amounts to the same result. even farmers (remember those?) don’t work outside all winter. with their new technology, they virtually stay in climate-controlled conditions most of the time. when they have any work at all.

so i’m wondering if i need a more natural, organic approach, while i am in a position to implement it. one that works with, not against, instincts that are there for a reason. sane people used to use winter as a time to sit by a warm fire and conserve energy, with nice warm cozy drinks. now people race around on frigid highways, in a frenzy to hit the pricey gym and work off all the holiday fat. that seems backwards to me. but in a world of commuting to tedious cubicles year-round, i guess human instincts take a back seat to so-called reality. most people don’t have the luxury of just taking the whole winter off, nor do they normally exert themselves outdoors most of the year. our western world has become an artificial environment, so our natural instincts are no longer relevant, and go dormant. so-to-speak. (hibernation going dormant, is that oxymoronic? or a double-negative? or not nothing?)

i’m sure anyone reading this has already seen through my little ploy to distract you while i continue to sit at my warm computer, avoiding yet another cold, unnatural outdoor exercise. or, how about this strategy: i’m substituting writing of some kind for outdoor activity on very cold days. no, didn’t think so. still, more implausible things have happened. just suspend your disbelief, as you would with any improbable fantasy. it’s a discipline, like any other. writing inspiring treatises is hard work! eventually i will run out of pointless idle discourses and need to go air out. outside. in the cold. no wait, i feel another inspiration coming on…

cleverly, i suspect no one can honestly challenge my logic, without exposing their own record lapses! to them i say: QWERTY!!

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