Today was another bearable day for walking roundtrip and working in the garden, where I got a lot done.  I weeded and reseeded the whole perimeter, then started in on the interior of the veg garden.  I discovered some peppers, at last!  I dug up all the carrots, and will work my way from front to back, digging up stubborn weeds, cleaning up crops, and cultivating.  I may go ahead and plant fall greens, then eventually till the whole thing under with compost and leaf mulch/wood chips.

Avdi worked all day, and I made us lunch.  A boring but productive day.  Edit: I almost forgot the best part: a hummingbird flew right up to me and hovered there, looking at me!  I’m pretty sure I didn’t look or smell like a flower, but it was curious.  That was not boring!

Once again, MO weather never fails to…confuse!  One day it could boil seafood, the next it’s like early fall.

Needless to say, I got busy in the garden.  So much needs help, I didn’t make it past the outskirts of the veg garden so far.  The green zucchini was officially a lost cause (possibly also my green thumb), so I reseeded the space in hopes of a late harvest.  The good news is, I found the first tiny red cherry tomato, finally!  Avdi got the honor of eating it.  On the other hand, the neglected okra is having no problem turning out huge middle fingers of defiance!

Later, I made us dinner using up some produce from the garden and leftovers.

Note this butterfly having just emerged from its chrysalis and flexing its wings.

I had to keep reminding myself, it’s just the primary, but looking at some of the counts, albeit incomplete, there may be some hope for this state yet (cautious optimism).  The main race for Prez and our future is still to come, but those numbers are looking up, as well.  Tim Walz was a great choice for VP.  It may just tip the scales to Kamala.  Dare we hope?  I’m out of practice, need to dust off my optimism, if not idealism.  I mean, if a drag queen can win a city election, seems to me that’s a good sign.  Go Maxi!

After voting, I continued on to Avdi’s to water the garden, etc.  It’s been so hot and humid, I couldn’t safely work out there, but there’s always stuff to do inside.  Later, we ate dinner at a local sports bar and watched election returns coming in, and the Olympics.  The Cards were playing Tampa Bay; I think “we” won, wasn’t really paying attention.

It’s supposed to get cooler as of today, so I can get more done in the garden.

I finally got to meet some of the other tenants–from the other building– yesterday evening.  It turns out they all know each other, like an actual community, and they decided to host a little family-friendly block party in a corner of the parking lot, with BBQ, music, all kinds of homemade food, and drinks.

Interestingly, though both buildings got invitations, I was almost the only one there from mine.  Representing, I guess.  A totally different vibe from my building.  Also, as it happens, I was one of like two white people there, and the other guy was tight with all of them.

There were big cigar-like joints being passed.  I still can’t get over that it’s legal!  Once they realized I was into it, they even gave me some weed to take home!  There was a whole bin full of homemade “punch” made by dumping bottles of every kind of booze in it, renamed “Rikers Island Iced Tea”.  Between the punch and the smokes, I was feeling very at ease!

Everyone was very nice.  The people I talked to were also transplants from other states–finally, other people not born and bred in MO!  There was a tiny dog there, a pug, usually not my favorite breed, but hey, an animal!  He and I got to be on very friendly terms, once I kept feeding him some of the delicious food, which just kept appearing in big aluminum pans.  A couple of guys presided over the grills.  A card game got started.

Several people hosted and provided all the food.  It was hot and humid out, so I got my big oscillating fan and they rigged it up.  I just sat and got stoned and enjoyed the whole euphoric vibe for a couple of hours.  It was interesting, being the minority there, but no one made me feel unincluded.  I made sure it was OK before I took these few photos.

Eventually I wandered “home” and had a good sleep!  No after-effects.  It was a completely different kind of “wonderland” from the Museum, but the same exact euphoria of reaching out of my usual boundaries and experiencing another dimension of reality and community.

Last night was my most memorable outing with Avdi yet.  Words won’t even begin, but I’ll try.  Maybe the photos will elaborate.

First we went to the famous Broadway Oyster Bar (“BOB”) and had Cajun food and tropical cocktails.  We ate out on the patio.  I felt like we were back in Baltimore.  Casual, eclectic, and colorful, and the food was excellent and more than enough.  It set the relaxed mood for what was to follow.

Drumroll…at last, my first experience of The City Museum, which isn’t so much a museum as a magical sensory labyrinth of dark mysterious caverns, tunnels, narrow stairways to heaven, trippy fantastical marvels, bars and dance floors here and there, and a fabulous, windy panorama on the roof of the city far below.  All the installations were creatively constructed using salvaged pieces of the old city.  At night, it’s even more atmospheric and Lovecraftian, minus the kid mobs.  We practically had the place to ourselves, until we found our way to the roof party.

We had beers at the iconic Beatnik Bob’s, like a hippie hangout at the end of the universe.  Everything in the Museum is totally interactive and hands-on.  There’s even a museum-like section with “antiquities” and nature specimens.  You could lose yourself just navigating all the secret passageways snaking up and down throughout.  Avdi persuaded me (it didn’t take much prodding) to explore, climb, crawl, and even go on the ferris wheel and slide down a chute.  I think I even surprised myself.

The whole experience is seriously like tripping through the looking glass in wonderland–I actually felt a little high and yet more myself.  Hard to describe.  Thanks to my son for encouraging me to stretch my limits and have fun doing it.  Here are the photos to prove it wasn’t just a hallucination.

I got to see Avdi again after his weeklong trip to Knoxville.  He looked more rested.  We did our respective jobs, and later we ate takeout Thai.  We had a video call with Y on their birthday.  The garden was doing fine in the boiling heat, me not so much!  Inevitably I found more indoor projects to make things more organized.  Scintillating, isn’t it?

OK, maybe just a little mini-rant.  OK, maybe not so mini.  Possibly some thunder involved.

Sometimes I hate this state.  If my son and gkids weren’t here, I wouldn’t be either.  Repugs are just plain evil.

I thought maybe I’d give Legal Services of MO a shot at negotiating my eligibility for Medicaid, having tried and failed myself a number of times.  After some time, they came back with the same answer.  I have a fixed annuity, which I can’t just take money from without penalties, which adds a few hundred dollars monthly to my tiny SSA income so I can survive until I die.  According to their technicality, I have “resources”.  Too much “income” for getting much-needed assistance, too little income to pay for basic medical and other needs.  The old catch-22.  Or I could spend down what little I have, be essentially homeless, and hope Medicaid would come through and not screw me.

I’m 72, retired, with Leukemia (not to play that card!), and thousands of dollars in debt to my generous son who paid for outrageous dental bills I wasn’t expecting.  I’m still getting other medical bills from months ago that it seems my insurance didn’t cover.  I can’t afford another doctor or specialist for the rest of the year.  My landlord had mercy on me and reduced my rent increase, taking a loss himself, so I could stay housed.  Along with that increase, my utilities are no longer assisted, for similar reasons to Medicaid’s, and will go up.  These are just facts, not complaints.  (OK, maybe a little kvetching.)

I worked and earned the small income I receive.  Am I supposed to go back to work with few skills, and other obligations, and pull myself up by the bootstraps?  The point I want to make is, millions of Americans are going through this right now, and not just old farts.  Single parents with kids and a job can barely make it.

The Repug agenda in MO and the nation is to take away even more basic human rights and quality of life.  Every day in this state’s legislature and courts, and in most states as well, this fascist agenda is playing out before our eyes, if we bother to pay attention.  Maybe you think it doesn’t affect you and your demographic, but it will.  Worse, it will affect your children and loved ones.  If you ignore it, you’re still complicit.

I don’t know any other way to say this, so I’m just sharing it here.  It’s not just about me and my elder issues.  It’s about my gkids and friends fearing for their lives and healthcare if they’re non-binary or trans.  It’s about my Black friends and kids fearing for their lives just by existing.  It’s about women being refused emergency medical care and told they can die or continue to be abused.  It’s about refugees from political persecution being turned away from our borders because, IDK, they’re just like the immigrants who died building this country and doing our dirty work for us.  It’s about the rightful natives of America, the few descendants who survived our genocide, being respected and treated like humans.  It’s about every one of us, if we choose to vote for nazis, or not vote at all.

So, as I said to my very kind (Black) legal counselor, unsolicited gratuitous plug for Kamala Harris!  (I could tell we were on the same page.  Also, unrelated, she had lots of cats!)  You know, I think she was the only human I’ve talked to in a week!  Solitude gives me too much time to think.

Apropos of nothing, here’s Avdi’s newly reorganized bar, now that he’s home to enjoy it.

I will say the weather here is never mediocre or half-assed–it’s always extreme.  This week featured t-storms and excessive heat alerts at the same time, with heat indices approaching India standards.  Good excuse to just stay home and have writer’s block–nothing to write about, with my caretaking complete.  Just awaiting Avdi’s return, and doing procrastinated chores.  Yep, that’s my riveting life.

I could comment on the most recent example of calling 911 while being Black, then getting shot to death by a cop for her troubles.  It’s no wonder people of color take their own chances rather than call the police.  Half the time the cops are unstable, unvetted, and have records themselves.  Even a little psycho.  Imagine calling for help with an intruder, then a cop murders you instead for no reason.  I know this goes on every day in every state, and more articulate, informed people have written about it and acted upon it.  This is just me, a nobody sitting here wondering how it is humans are still insane savages, still regressing in 2024.

OK, like I said, not much to say here.  I just spent a week with pretty much no human contact, not that hard to do, so that’s my excuse.  I’m still alive, so that’s something!  Maybe I need alien contact–probably more civilized.

I did my rounds dutifully, telling myself I wouldn’t do any “projects” today, then of course found a few more small ones to do.  I even peered into the dreaded Catacombs of Cthulhu, just to take a look.  Eldritch!  Back to that some other time.  T-storms were threatening, anyway, an excuse to cut things short.  I got a lot done this week, and survived solitary.  If it helped Avdi, then my work is done.

The biggest garden news is some tiny green tomato sightings!  Finally.  Oddly, I can’t seem to grow green zucchini, one of the easiest veggies to grow.   Some the yellow ones are appearing, though.  A few melons are present, too.  If the sweet potatoes turn out as profuse as their thick row of leaves, then that will be a first for me.  And the greens are like jungle plants.

Each day at A’s, I do a little deeper dive into cleaning and organizing.  Don’t Panic Avdi, it’s all good!  It’s so uncomfortable outside, it gives me an excuse to be productive inside.  I still haven’t gotten up the nerve to penetrate the dark Catacombs of Cthulhu yet.  The day will come.

This is the first erev in a long time that I’ve been alone, with no one to do preps for or go out to dinner with.  But I’m OK with it.  Avdi has done his time of hard labor and earned this time away.  And I’m pretty good at doing solitary!  I’m sure I’m not alone in being alone.