When you find yourself in unfortunate circumstances, ask yourself the following:
- Did I choose, either by action or inaction, to get myself into this predicament?
- Is it possible, or appropriate, to attempt to extricate myself from this situation, or to upgrade it?
- If not, am I going to keep on whining and feeling sorry for myself, or…
- Can I take responsibility for being here, recognize that I don’t have control over these circumstances, and turn them into an opportunity to update or rethink my values/priorities?
In other words, I do in a sense have control, maybe not over the circumstances, but in how I respond and work with them to reinvent my reality. I could feel the way society wants me to feel, a total loser and failure, or I can learn to accept and feel content within outward misfortune, adapt and be resourceful with what I’ve got. That is, own it.
This may seem obvious and simplistic, but for me it’s a major lesson to absorb and implement. The culture I was born into, and that I unconsciously compare myself to, tells me that I have failed to achieve, fall short, lack purpose, am not ‘special’, whatever, which causes anxiety and stress. But once I release myself from all those artificial capitalistic expectations and accept and own my current situation, life is just simpler, more focused on what’s important and realistic. The possibilities…
(I’ve been reading smarter people’s articles and thoughts, and trying to apply them. And here you thought I was that original!)